Summary

So, you want to diversify your network authentically.  Where do you begin? The process often feels overwhelming, especially if you’re not quite sure how to define your goals. Those efforts can also lead to tokenism without thoughtful consideration given to the people behind the demographics.

Erica and India return to break down the concept of network diversification with actionable and, yes, authentic steps to help you broaden your associations as well as cultivate greater awareness of the world around you.

In this discussion:

Defining authenticity and diversity in the context of network development

• Identifying new-to-you sources for information, art, and opinion

• Vetting your roster of go-to experts

• Avoiding the pitfalls of tokenization

• Reconsidering your normal

• Connecting to a variety of opportunities

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Article

What does it mean to diversify your network authentically? And, where do you even begin that process?

While the phrasing of that desire isn't one that Erica and India particularly love, it often comes up in conversations with clients and workshop participants. "It's usually coming from a place of realizing that they're ready for a change, or they're wanting a change––that doesn't necessarily mean they're ready for it," says India, "but they realize that something needs to shift and that their network is not reflecting who they are." Or what matters to them, for that matter. "They also don't want to be that person randomly being like, 'Hey, Brown person! Come be my friend!’" she adds. 

These are legit concerns that typically stem from a genuine desire to act in a way that doesn't tokenize people. "It essentially comes from this place of, 'I am surrounded by people, and too many of them look, live, and love just like I do,'" says Erica. This kind of limited network doesn't lead folks to do anything differently, "which means I'm not going to get a different outcome, and I don't want to keep doing the same thing, but I don't want to just insert-Brown-person-here," says Erica.

Or, if we're talking about someone that presents as a man, I'm just going to stick a woman in here, and it's all fine. "It really is understanding that this is not about, from a demographic standpoint, let me just insert a few people that are different, and it's all good," Erica points out. "It really is, 'I want to do this differently, and I just don't know how the hell to do it; I can't wrap my brain around it because it seems like such a huge thing.'"

Information Is The Entry Point

In considering a starting point, "one of the first things that comes to my mind is taking a look at what information you are consuming," India offers, "not just the information itself, but where are you getting that information from, you know?” For example, consider the news outlets you consume when you're seeing what's trending on social media.  She asks, “Who are you even following to see what their concerns are? Who are these people? When you are getting information about what's happening in your local community, you know, who are you getting that information from? What humans are sharing with you? What websites are you looking at? What books are you reading?"

The questions don't exist in a vacuum. "The way that we take in information and what we quantify as the accurate information that we're going to take as truth, it’s shifted so much because before we had social media––and for some people, even before they had, you know, television news, let alone an abundance of places to get it from––it really was your clergy, the people in your neighborhood, the organizations that you were a part of, the school that your children went to, where it is that you work. These places that you frequented as a part of your day-to-day life very often were where you got your frames of reference from." 

Who’s Your Expert?

Once you've received this information, though, how do you decide whose word you're going to accept as truth?

"It's important to look at the truth of things," India acknowledges,  “if you really dig deeper into it, music is information. Have you expanded what you're willing to listen to in the arts and music and film and whatever else?" All of these pieces combine to formulate our more diverse worldview and give us a fuller picture of what's really happening globally, locally, and how folks feel. "You could literally ask one person about something, or you could consume something on one podcast about a topic––we've all done it; if you're listening to this podcast, you probably listened to other podcasts––and then you go listen to the same type of topic on a different podcast, and it has a different feel to it. Or it covers a different aspect of it. Or maybe they have an opposite opinion about it."

"There is a difference between truth and fact," says Erica, “I have a truth; you have a truth. Everyone has their truth: this is what is my thing. But I think there's a fact where a fact is this is data; this is what happened. This does not have perspective on it; this does not have perception on it." 

Film, music, movies, media, these things are generally created with a perspective. "There's a perception in that. So, when you think about who's an expert somewhere, you really want to acknowledge, like, okay, is there perception showing up here? Are we talking about truth? Are we talking about facts? Because I do think that that is going to influence the authenticity (or lack thereof) when you are looking at diversifying your network. And that's just my opinion. I know that might be an unpopular one possibly, but that's my thought on it."

India agrees. "I think that there's also an unpopular opinion that, when we look at diversity, equity, and inclusion, people forget the diversity in a sense of it being variety. It's not just about going out and finding a demographic to go listen to or to go see as a new expert in a field or consume their music and content and food and whatever cultural pieces, or to become friends with on a personal note. It's also about looking at the variety of the psychographic, their opinions, their values, and things like that because I do believe that there's immense value in surrounding yourself with people who have some different things that they're bringing to the table than you do."

Considering differing opinions on the same topic or opposing viewpoints on the same industry will also guide you in formulating more well-rounded thinking of your own because "it's really challenging to live in a world and be innovative and to really begin to think outside of the box for yourself and find what is your actual truth, that's not coming from society standards and biases, if everything that you're consuming in a particular area of expertise (or field or topic or hobby) is only coming from one person or one point of view even if it's multiple people," India says.

Authentic People-Powered Connections

Developing awareness around the information you're taking in can organically diversify your network. Ask yourself where am I getting my information from? Who is it coming from? How much variety in opinion am I exposing myself to? 

Folks who want to do something differently often start by searching for a formula: Complete A and B to get to C. They're missing the key ingredient. "Being that we're talking about authentically diversifying your network and we started talking about information, I just really need to acknowledge and call out the fact that we went back to the most important piece of this, which is people," says Erica. 

"When people are deciding that they want to go on a journey of an uncharted area or an area that they feel like they're not as secure [or] confident in, they start to consume information first," agrees India. "'You don't have to. You can start with the people." She's witnessed many within the POTP audience start by consuming information, whether podcasts, books, or social media. "I think that when you can begin to shift what information you take in, then you can also begin to now look at, 'Okay. I'm taking in this book; I'm taking in this podcast. Let me actually hold space for the humans behind it. Let me take a look at what their values are. What are their hobbies? What do they enjoy? How do they express themselves? What activities do they take part in? What events do they go to? I think that that can begin to help you see as you move from that into what might you want to invite into your life with who you surround yourself with?" For many, this can feel like a challenging aspect of the diversification process. 

For her part, Erica has witnessed folks stress over what they currently lack. "I've heard people say things like 'I don't know a lot of diverse people!' or 'I don't have anyone diverse in my network!' or 'I don't know how to change this!'" She's also been privy to conversations where people acknowledge that reality for others when discussing spaces where there isn't that diversity. "You have an opportunity to really challenge the way that you're processing information, what information you're choosing to process, who you are highlighting as a person that you want to take in their particular perceptions and the way that they're processing things," Erica says, adding, “Now, the hope is that it will feel less daunting or less like, ‘I'm throwing spaghetti at the wall because I don't have any options. I don’t know what to do here,’ because now you've shifted some things and hopefully options are beginning to show up around you if you're willing to pay attention to them."

India expands on the point. "I think it's about when you shifted all those other things first -- the information, what experts you're looking at and consuming content from, et cetera, are even on your radar -- that can help you move through this mindset that I think some people have of, like, I want to do things differently. But maybe you don't actually believe that people who are doing things differently actually exist or that they're not accessible to you. So, being able to literally consume in such a way that the people you are taking in, even if you don't know them, are the kind of people you want to be around. It can help you get past that barrier to say, if they're there, there's gotta be more people like this." 

She adds that such a shift can provide moments of clarity about what specifically you want to call in more of and what you don't want to attract.

Your Opportunities Are Greater Than Your Fears

Exposure to opportunity is a huge part of reconsidering your normal, a concept that Erica frequently talks about because "you don't acknowledge certain things because you don't think that you have access to them. It could be sitting right next to you, but you just were not open or available to receive that. And so, being that you've made these other shifts, everything changes. Everything." 

"I think sometimes it comes out of what you're focused on," India says. "If you're so focused on the change and fear, then that fear can stop you from seeing the possibilities." 

Fear is an element that routinely shows up. "I think being able to take that fear out of it as much as possible, it completely shifts the way you process what you have access to,” says Erica. “You will really begin to observe what's happening around you, and you will notice things very, very differently. And you'll begin to observe, 'I didn't even know that that was there!'" She equates that revelation to Where's Waldo books in which you take the time to realize all of the imagery staring right back at you on the page until you suddenly "find" Waldo, who's been hiding in plain sight the whole time.

"I think that one of the most beautiful ways to begin to shift who you're surrounding yourself with is to take a look at the opportunities already in front of you," India agrees. "As you're consuming content, as you are listening to podcasts with hosts that feel aligned for you, even if maybe two hosts that you listened to have different opinions, you'll know in your body. You'll just be able to feel like, 'Yes, I want more of this.'" 

Diversifying The Good Stuff

Invariably, the diverse content will connect you with even more good stuff. For those who've followed the discussions here at POTP, you already know that Erica and India share an opportunity with you every week. They welcome you to surround yourself with people who put their values and the causes they support at the forefront. Pause On The Play The Community invites every member to attach those details to their profile, for example. "I mean, it's the easiest way that I can think of to be able to meet new individuals to surround yourself with, to get some support, build new friendships, learn about new experts," says India. 

"We're really not even talking about it from a point of like, 'Oh, come join our community,'" Erica says. "It really is about, hey, some of these things that you know you want to do, some of these things that you're trying to do differently, I do have an option for you. I have an alternative to maybe what has not felt like it's worked; well, let's try this." Pause On The Play The Community has proven itself to be the option that, for many, has allowed them to have success with their initial motivation for membership as well as receive wins in so many other areas. "Simply because they allowed themselves to show up, be there, be in conversation, be in relationship, and to allow the work to kind of do what it does."

When anyone commits to the journey of talking about their values publicly and beginning to shift things, "you will lose people, and I think that many people come to terms with that and are okay with it," India says. "But there comes a time where it's like, you don't want to be on this journey alone, so you need people you can add back in that feel great to take part, especially if you're someone who has a platform that you share, like a podcast or Instagram Live or whatever that is. Or you hire speakers to come and do trainings in your space. You absolutely need to surround yourself, maybe even more so than anyone with some new faces that are completely aligned that you can begin to shift who was already contributing to your platforms in that way. There's been so many wins that I've seen in our community from people doing that." 

We all have the opportunity to venture beyond our usual business networks. Actively seeking information, art, entertainment, and opinion from those who don't look, live, or love like us is where to begin, witnessing those insights and honoring diverse contributions. As India says, "We all benefit from having more people around us that truly want to see us win and are willing to help us get there."

Quotes

Erica Courdae

“It really is understanding that this is not about, from a demographic standpoint, ‘let me just insert a few people that are different and it's all good.’ It really is, ‘I want to do this differently, and I just don't know how to hell to do it.’”

“I think there is a difference between truth and fact. I have a truth; you have a truth. Everyone has their truth.”

“I think the fear...it stops you from seeing possibilities. It makes options much less, and they don't even feel like they're there, let alone something that you could do.”

India Jackson

“I do believe that there's immense value in surrounding yourself with people who have some different things that they're bringing to the table than you do.”

“If you're so focused on the change and fear, then that fear can stop you from seeing the possibilities.” 

“We all benefit from having more people around us that truly want to see us win and are willing to help us get there.”

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